I'll Try It Again...
The first time I went to Greenland, somebody told me to try a danish, so I did- His name was Neils. Actually, he was part Danish, part Greenlandic, so he had dark hair. He was a dancer in Denmark before coming to Greenland to work, and he was mighty fine. I kissed him, because I wanted to see what it was like to kiss someone who is not from the United States. He kissed quite well.
The Blog gods were not good to me on Friday, so in the words of my other Danish friend, Pow (i probably butchered that spelling), "I'll try it again."
I have said before that I must be a cold-hearted bitch, but I just don't feel that sad about the loss of Johnny Carson. Don't get me wrong, I'm not overjoyed either, but I was more saddened by the death of Jerry Orbach. My mom, on the other hand, was crying her eyes out this morning. I see it as this, Johnny had a good life and helped to launch the careers of so many people who are successful in the entertainment industry today, and seventy-nine is young to me, but he is in a better place now. He did not suffer. I was more upset when George Harrison passed away.
Speaking of George Harrison, last night I dreamdt I was on a road trip with the late Linda McCartney and Paul, at least I think it was Paul. We were riding motorcycles and had to pull over, because Judy Tenuta was on the rampage and was going to get dust all over us. What?!? This was not alcohol induced, I swear. Judy Tenuta?!? The only thing I did last night before going to bed was watch a couple first-season episodes of Law and Order: Criminal Intent, take my vitamins (Yes, they were vitamins. I don't just call them my vitamins.), and go over some possible topics for my research paper.
This brings me to one of my favorite Steven Wrightisms: "To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research."
I learned that co-dependency is not what I thought it was, but, you know, whatever works for co-dependent people also works for me. I'm not picky.
I don't mean to brag, but I also learned what a megalomaniac is.
Gee, college is great!
One more thing, the UN can go ahead and piss off for saying that the United States can contribute more than $35 million to the Tsunami victims. If the UN would just use this simple formula I am about to conjure up, they will see that the United States has been more than generous. The formula:
10% of Country's Per Capita Income - Amount Country is in debt to its tax payers =
Amount Country can contribute
If you plug in the numbers, you can see that the United States has been more than generous. So, piss off, UN!
Now, run away.
The Blog gods were not good to me on Friday, so in the words of my other Danish friend, Pow (i probably butchered that spelling), "I'll try it again."
I have said before that I must be a cold-hearted bitch, but I just don't feel that sad about the loss of Johnny Carson. Don't get me wrong, I'm not overjoyed either, but I was more saddened by the death of Jerry Orbach. My mom, on the other hand, was crying her eyes out this morning. I see it as this, Johnny had a good life and helped to launch the careers of so many people who are successful in the entertainment industry today, and seventy-nine is young to me, but he is in a better place now. He did not suffer. I was more upset when George Harrison passed away.
Speaking of George Harrison, last night I dreamdt I was on a road trip with the late Linda McCartney and Paul, at least I think it was Paul. We were riding motorcycles and had to pull over, because Judy Tenuta was on the rampage and was going to get dust all over us. What?!? This was not alcohol induced, I swear. Judy Tenuta?!? The only thing I did last night before going to bed was watch a couple first-season episodes of Law and Order: Criminal Intent, take my vitamins (Yes, they were vitamins. I don't just call them my vitamins.), and go over some possible topics for my research paper.
This brings me to one of my favorite Steven Wrightisms: "To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research."
I learned that co-dependency is not what I thought it was, but, you know, whatever works for co-dependent people also works for me. I'm not picky.
I don't mean to brag, but I also learned what a megalomaniac is.
Gee, college is great!
One more thing, the UN can go ahead and piss off for saying that the United States can contribute more than $35 million to the Tsunami victims. If the UN would just use this simple formula I am about to conjure up, they will see that the United States has been more than generous. The formula:
10% of Country's Per Capita Income - Amount Country is in debt to its tax payers =
Amount Country can contribute
If you plug in the numbers, you can see that the United States has been more than generous. So, piss off, UN!
Now, run away.
posted by Jeni @ 5:55 PM
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